Anxiety, or panic, is becoming more and more prevalent in the clients I see for therapy. Therefore I wanted to say a few words about anxiety, and more importantly on how to overcome it. For most people, the symptoms of anxiety seem to come “out of the blue”. They feel uneasy, nervous, or afraid, and often become frustrated because there is no apparent reason. Anxiety is based in a fear of something. It can be of an object, judgment, and idea, almost anything. Very often the person realizes that the fear is irrational, but is unable to stop it, or overcome it. In my experience, anxiety is often brought on by repetitive ‘what if ’ thoughts. “What if I’m dying, what if they know, what if something bad happens, what if I look dumb, it happened here before so it will again. There are numerous causes for anxiety. However, overcoming anxiety doesn’t always require knowing where it comes from. Being aware and learning to challenge negative self talk is what is most important. Once the panic feeling has subsided, then we can look back at what lead to the symptoms and how we can learn from the experience to prevent further attacks. So, how do we manage a panic attack?
First: Acknowledge it, don’t fight it.
We have to recognize that we are anxious, having a panic attack and then move through it. Anyone who has experienced a panic attack knows that the harder you try to stop it, the more powerful it feels. Thoughts of dying, appearing foolish or weak dominate the mind. We say things like: what is wrong with me, this is ridiculous, everybody knows I’m freaking out, etc. All of these thoughts only make the attack seem worse, and contribute to it lasting longer. Tell yourself, I know I’m having a panic attack and this is what helps.
Second: Practice Deep Breathing
Once you have acknowledged that the attack is happening, you have to breathe. Panic symptoms usually involve a shortness of breath, feeling like your chest is heavy, feeling like you cannot escape, etc. Taking a few minutes to focus on your breathing helps distract you from the attack, and helps to slow the mind. In any stressful situation, taking 3-5 minutes to just breathe will relax you. A deep breath should last between 8 and 10 seconds. In to a count of 5 and out to a count of 5. It’s like taking a time out for the mind.
Third: Positive Self Talk
As I mentioned before, what if thoughts are a key contributor to panic symptoms continuing. We need to practice telling ourselves that we are OK, this will pass, I’m not dying, nobody can see that I’m uncomfortable, everything will be alright, etc. Learning to challenge negative messages helps us move through the issue vs trying to run from it. Wayne Dyer, in his book ‘Excuses be Gone’, said that if we cannot predict with 100% certainty that something will be bad, and we cannot predict with 100% certainty that it will be good, then why go to the bad. We have to practice seeing positives and reminding ourselves that we are in control of our reactions and thoughts.
